The Boy Who Cried Wolfenschnitzeltron

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THE BOY WHO CRIED WOLFENSCHNITZELTRON

I WAS THE LONE TEENWOLF IN THE PERSIAN GULF
THE HEAD OF MY PLATOON
UNTIL A SINGLE SILVER BULLET ALMOST GRAZED MY MULLET
WHILE I WAS HOWLING AT THE MOON

BUT THE GUYS JUST WOULDN'T BELIEVE ME
ABOUT THIS BRAND NEW BAND I'D HEARD
THE NAME OF THE BAND THAT I KEPT ON SINGING
WAS JUST A BIT TOO ABSURD, NOW

I'M THE BOY WHO CRIED WOLFENSCHNITZEL
I'M THE BOY WHO CRIED WOLFENSCHNITZEL
I'M THE BOY WHO CRIED WOLFENSCHNITZEL
I'M THE BOY WHO CRIED WOLFENSCHNITZELTRON

A QUICK DISCHARGE AND A PLANE BACK HOME
I WAS ON THE STREETS OF PHILLY
I PLAYED A MP3 FOR SEAN AGNEW
BUT HE SAID "MAN THAT SHIT'S TOO SILLY"

A MANIC STREET PREACHER, A SKEEZY SEX-ED TEACHER
I TRIED EVERYTHING I COULD
TO GET THE WORD OUT TO THE PEOPLE
THAT WOLFENSCHNITZELTRON WAS GOOD

CHORUS

THERE ARE 70 MILLION WOLF BANDS
IN THE KNOWN UNIVERSE
WOLFENSCHNITZELTRON IS BAD
BUT AIDS WOLF IS DEFINITELY WORSE

IRONIC POPPED COLLARS
SLAMMIN' HIPHOP DOLLARS!
I HAD TO SELL DRUGS TO SURVIVE
BUT AFTER TEN YEARS I'D EARNED ENOUGH MONEY
TO SEE WOLFENSCHNITZELTRON LIVE

WELL LONG STORY SHORT THEY REALLY SUCKED
WHAT A BUMMER I KNOW
BUT THAT'S OK 'CAUSE I GOT A GAT
AND SHOT THEM AFTER THE SHOW, CAUSE

I'M THE BOY WHO KILLED WOLFENSCHNITZEL
I'M THE BOY WHO KILLED WOLFENSCHNITZEL
I'M THE BOY WHO KILLED WOLFENSCHNITZEL
I'M THE BOY WHO KILLED WOLFENSCHNITZELTRON

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from Wolfenschnitzeltron, released January 1, 2010

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Wolfenschnitzeltron Ardmore, Pennsylvania

Chased through the glittering neon streets of Germantown by Mecha-Dracula II, Castlevania-Tron stumbles upon the 1990 Tyco Hot Keyz keytar, thought lost for hundreds of years. Uniting with other likeminded youths, he forms Philadelphia's only Teutonic synth-rock group...WOLFENSCHNITZELTRON. ... more

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